One Day at a Time

When you have a newborn they tell you to take it one day at a time. Every day things get a little bit better and a little bit easier. I hate to admit it, but it's true. Babies start falling into a routine (a loose one) but nonetheless it's a patterned behavior. Some days you feel like pulling your hair out and crying, but it's funny how a little bit of sleep can give you a new perspective and outlook on life. They speak of the magical "12 weeks" mark where babies seem to have some sort of switch that flips on and they sleep a little bit longer and have a more agreeable behavior. I have almost 7 weeks left until I hit that mark. Not that I'm counting.

The working out front has been a little bit disheartening on the other hand. Having a csection you have to wait until the 6 week mark. I tried looking up exercises for women who have had csections but there is really nothing out there that is recommended besides walking - and we're talking "non aerobic walking." Everything that I've read says to take it easy which is easier said than done. At almost 5 weeks in you feel as though you're pretty much completely healed except for a reminder in the form of a scar. My scar overall looks healed except for a small inflamed area. I read it's normal but a part of me can't help but be paranoid about it and so I've been religiously dousing Neosporin on it and an ointment call C-Mama Healing Salve.

Even though I've been trying to take it easy I do try and walk at least once around the neighborhood (which is almost 3/4 of a mile). If I don't manage to walk around the neighborhood then I resort to treadmill walking. My goal lately has been to try and get a mile under 25 minutes. It seems easy but when you're trying not to push it... well... it's pretty damn hard. Trust me if it wasn't for getting the okay from the doctor I would try running the whole thing at one time. Regardless I nailed my goal on the first try and hope to get progressively better! Check it out :)

Nailed It!!!

As far as my nutrition goes I've been trying to make better food choices since I can't work out as much and I want to lose weight. So far I've lost almost 20 pounds but still have about 38-40 pounds left to get down to my pre-pregnancy weight of 145. I gained a lot of weight which was frustrating but there's nothing I can do about it now and I just have to work a little bit harder to get to where I was. Plus, I've got the best wardrobe and want to be able to fit back into it. On the bright side, I did find a fun new product that I liked which is a healthy food option - Rani's Yummy Buttered Oats! I got it in my Runner's Box for Christmas and I actually ended up liking it so much I think I'll be ordering it twice a month. It's a little pricey $15 with shipping for 12oz bag, but I love the product, the nutritional value, and the fact that I support a small business owner. Plus they handwrote me a note which was flipping awesome. Overall, I think I'll be trying to find a couple of healthy food options as I go. Well, I better get going... until the next post - Happy Trails!!

How cute is this note?? Ugh - they totally suckered me lol!!


Trying to figure out a sleep schedule has been hard. My amazing husband was able to get 6 weeks off with his company and if it weren't for that time off that he had, I think I would have died from sleep deprivation. Now don't get me wrong. I'm not sleeping 8 hours a day, hell, I would be happy with 5 hours in a row. I get enough where I'm functional and can nap during the day AND that is all around amazing and wouldn't be possible if my husband were working.

Now there are different reasons why we aren't sleeping. 1- She fusses throughout the night and won't let either of us sleep if she were in the same room with us.2 - She doesn't stay swaddled and pulls the blankets over her head which scares the bejesus out of me. 3- I just am terrified to let her sleep by herself. She does settle for a couple of hours throughout the night but it's sporadic and will depend on her mood. I wish I could sleep while she's sleeping when it's my "shift" but I can't because I'm paranoid. I bought the Angelcare monitor with the intent to use it so it could calm my fears, but I can't use it in every "crib environment" that we have. What I mean by that is that you can only place it under a mattress: think a pack and play or a crib. It won't work if the baby sleeps in something like a portable bassinet or a swing (not that I condone this - I'm just giving examples of crib environments I've heard of parents using). We use a portable bassinet and there is no way I could use it. Another con that it has is that it literally beeps all of the time - think when you were at the hospital getting your vitals monitored.

So - what other options do I really have? I've been researching a bunch of products and came across the Owlet. I actually had another mom recommend it to me but mentioned it was pretty pricey but worth every penny. Originally I thought the Angelcare monitor would take care of all my worries, but I was mistaken. It doesn't work for us and that's okay. Just like with having a baby - you need to keep adjusting until you figure it out. So I might get the Owlet lol. It's a sock!! A freaking sock. So you can monitor her pulse oximetry and movement through a freaking sock. If something is wrong it alerts you. It doesn't beep all of the time - it literally let's you know when you need to intervene. Will this ease my mind - absolutely. Totally worth it. However, before buying this, let's see if I somehow win it in this giveaway I entered. Fingers crossed!

So there you have it. My sleeping woes explained. She'll be one month old this Monday and I'm hoping she's sleep trained herself by then - bwahahaha until then I hope it gets better.... One day at a time.. I'll leave you with a picture of why I don't sleep -

Three Weeks In

So we're three weeks in folks! Let me tell you that this is not like anything I ever imagined lol. First off no one tells you that you literally don't sleep lol. You might sleep in spurts but it's pretty crappy sleep. They tell you to sleep when the baby sleep, but let's be real - who really can sleep on command unless they're at the point of complete hallucination? I almost feel like you get enough sleep to survive, but not to the point where you can sleep on command. Secondly, you learn about all of the things you can do with one hand. People - it's incredible I tell you! Lastly, things are not made for smaller babies. She was only 6.5 pounds when she was born and most things are made for 8 pound babies. She looks like she's swimming in most of the things we have for her. So there you have it - some of the things I've realized in these three weeks.

Although it's been hard, I have loved being her mom. As much as she tortures us with her crazy antics and cries, nothing beats when she smiles at you - even if it means she's just pooping. As tired as we both have been, my husband and I have been a team throughout this process which has made things a lot better. I can't imagine doing this alone or with someone who isn't that interested in being a dad. I literally give those women kudos. Like tons of kudos.

Another thing I've learned so far are some of the products which I swear by for her. I know every baby is different, but these are some of the things I LOVE (in no particular order):
  • Momaroo!!!!!
  • Aquaphor
  • Portable bassinet (this one came with our Pack and Play)
  • Boppy pillow
  • Rocking chair
  • Soothie pacifier
That's all I can think of for now. I'm sure as she's able to fit into more things my list will grow. Until then I'm going to take care of this little peanut :) Happy Trails!!

PS: I almost forgot!!! Today I decided to do a small arm workout with free weights. My workout consisted of three sets of four different arm exercises with 5 pound weights - military presses (15 reps); arm curls (30 reps on each arm); front arm raises (12 reps each arm); side arm raises (12 reps on each arm). I know this doesn't seem much but it's a start. I'm also going to try and incorporate a walk each day with her. My goal is to hit at least 5,000 steps a day. I know it's not 10,000 but people I had a csection and it hurts like ... well you know lol...

Labor and Delivery

She's almost three weeks old. I can't believe it. I'm so happy to be her mom and am so grateful that she has been a relatively easy baby. I know it's been a while since I've updated anything on here so I figured I would start with my labor experience...

Overall it was awful. I was induced and after getting tons of medication to begin the induction, my body just wasn't ready to deliver a baby. About 3-4 hours into the induction I experienced awful pain and since it was too early to get an epidural, they provided me with a medication to help with the pain. Bad idea. I reacted poorly to the medication and the room basically wouldn't stop spinning for two hours. I felt loopy and couldn't seem to really be "with it" which scared me. After the medication finally wore off two hours later I felt sick and nauseous.

They checked me again and my body just was not progressing. They decided to stop giving the medication to create the contractions since it seemed as though nothing was working. About 10 hours in I was in extreme pain and my body just was not budging. At that point I could get an epidural and I wholeheartedly accepted it and hoped for some relief. My contractions were literally so intense that the nurses were commenting on them based on the monitors. After the epidural the contractions were mild and I couldn't feel a thing, but I was so tired already that I was uncomfortable. My doctor had come in at this point and told me that she would continue to respect my wishes of delivering regularly; however, my labor was going to be a long process.

About 14-16 hours in the real fun began. The baby's heart started acting screwy (period of decreases followed by accelerations). The doctor wasn't "overly" concerned at this point, but it was worth her monitoring me. They let me take a break and eat something so I could have some strength for the next day. While I was eating the doctor came in to look at my monitor and continued to shake her head. They advised me to stop eating at this point in the event a csection was to take place. My doctor left to grab dinner and told me she would continue to keep in touch with me.

About an hour later I started feeling really sick. Something was wrong and I could feel it. They took my temperature and I was running a low grade fever. I was crying and just couldn't calm down. They called the doctor and told her what was going on. About 10 minutes later a nurse came in and told me they were going to take me to the operating room. I. WAS. DEVESTATED. I literally couldn't stop crying. I had tried for 17 hours to have her and my body was just determined to keep her in. I was in pain and uncomfortable and knew that this would end in a csection.

Once my doctor came in everything happened so quickly. I had a bunch of doctors and nurses talking to me and explaining what would happen. They drugged the crap out of me and took me to the operating room. Within 15 minutes she was out and I felt like I was in the biggest dream state. I was almost asleep while they were operating on me that's how tired I was. Once she was out she began crying her lungs out and I remember just repeatedly telling my husband that I wanted to hold her. I completely lost it once I got to hold her. She was absolutely perfect. I didn't care that I had gone through hell because she was okay and that's all that mattered.  They wheeled her off a few minutes later and I was left there to be repaired.

My epidural wore off quickly and I started experiencing pain again. When the doctor realized this they put me on morphine. I still felt pain. Once you have a csection they make sure your body heals properly and literally "massage" your abdomen/utereus area every 15 minutes for two hours. This was literally the most painful part of the whole process. I literally was hysterical and cried the entire time. My husband's hand was crushed in the process and my knuckles became bruised a few days later. Once that was over I would be taken to my room.

When I got to my room I got to hold her again. Even though I was exhausted and it had been over 24 hours since I had sleep, I just wanted to hold her. Once I got to hold her I felt like everything would be okay. After we got settled I passed the eff out. Even though the worst was over the pain from my recovery was rough. I later found out that my doctor was so concerned about her that she made the incision larger than she typically does. I wouldn't actually comfortably walk until about two weeks later. Even though the pain is gone that whole area is still tender and I refuse to let anything touch that area. I'm hoping that this all goes away soon and everything can return to normalcy. Until then I will continue to wear my husband's oversized gym shorts lol.

This has been a long post so I'll post again soon so I can talk about how this whole mom experience has been. I'm almost three weeks in and although I'm ridiculously tired, I don't even care. I love this little peanut so freaking much. Our lives are so much happier now.

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