My Tribe

It has been almost two years since I've really blogged about my running journey. It's easy to make excuses about why I haven't, but the truth is - my running journey has been hard the last few years. You always read the quote - it's not about having time to do the things you love, but rather making the time to do those things. In a sense I forgot how freeing it can feel to write down your emotions and thoughts. Hell, I forgot a lot of things along the way, but this year I promised to change a lot of things in my life. The most important change being to be kind to myself and allow myself to really be the person I'm meant to be.... so without further delay, my blog post for the week.

Being a mom is hard. It requires juggling, sacrificing and a whole lot of love. Now, don't get my wrong it's my favorite thing about who I am today, but dear Lord it is tough. Things that used to be easy for me to do on my own are quite near impossible - or are they? See, I used to say that to myself all of the time. I can't make this race because who will watch E or I can't make that training run because it's just too hard. And you know what - it is hard. It's hard for the first few minutes, or first few times, but then - it gets easier. So what am I talking about? Well, it started last month at a group training run our local run store, Runner's Depot, put on.

Another group training run popped up on my Facebook page and I silently huffed inside of my head. I would sign up for every single one before E was born but I hadn't signed up for one in a very long time. The excuses started playing in my head: E would still be in bed and I would just be tired so it wouldn't be worth it. But then I thought - why don't I ask E if she wants to go. She has showed an interest in running and this might actually be fun for the two of us. So I asked her. And you know what she said? I want to go to run club (lol - she equates all running events to run clubs).

So that morning I packed all of our stuff up in the car and headed out. When I got there I realized I was the only mom with a stroller. It was a 10 mile training run, but people could run whatever distance they wanted. I had planned for at least 6 miles. I knew that at any point my plans might have to change since I wasn't too sure how E would handle being in the stroller that long.

So off we started. I got a lot of kudos along the way; made me feel good. I mean let's be honest who doesn't like to be cheered on? But then - it happened. About 5 minutes in the whining started and her blanket kept falling. It lasted a good 10 minutes. So here I am a good mile into my run thinking I can't do this. I was frustrated and upset at myself for thinking that it was a good idea. I was defeated. I was getting ready to turn around and forget my goals.

But then do you know what happened? People I knew from my running days started helping. I had people talk to E to try and calm her down or pick up her blanket when it kept falling. People who kept telling me I could do this. And you know what? I became overwhelmed. I became overwhelmed because I had forgotten what a family my running community had become. I had forgotten that these people are my tribe. I had forgotten that we help one another, cheer each other on and how good it feels to see each other after not seeing each other for weeks. As runners we care. We set up goals and we achieve them. We look for opportunities to help our community or each other. We might not always find a tribe but when we do we hold on to them for dear life because these people understand us. They are our cheerleaders. And these small acts of kindness pushed me to keep running.

So why is this whole moment so monumental for me? Easy, because I was the only woman out there with a stroller. I was a symbol of perseverance. I did not let difficulty win that day. I showed up and most importantly showed my daughter what this runner life is all about. She actually had a lot of fun that day. She ended up taking a nap and I got in more than 6 miles. After the training run we had breakfast together and it was just FUN. Did I go as fast as I used to? Hell no lol. However, I SHOWED UP and I proved to myself I could do both things: be with my daughter and go to a group training run.

My daughter is watching me every day. It's important for her to watch me achieve my goals - with her tow. We are signed up for more 5Ks in our future together as a team. I have my own stroller 5K time I need to beat. Soon enough I'm sure E will start running with me and I just can't wait. So here is to more training runs and 5Ks with E #iracelikeagirl.