Disappointed...

Today was a disappointing training day. I know we are supposed to have these days. You know, the ones where we don't live up to our expectations, and work harder on the next run. I just hate how I feel during these runs, because I feel like a failure.

I know it's crazy to think of myself in this way. I mean, for crying in a bucket, I've placed in almost race since I've been here. But the thing is, I don't care about those races or how I placed (unless there's cash or food prizes - c'mon now); I care about my time, my race, my journey and how I felt. All these things I feel after doing a good solid race is the reward I get for the time I put in to accomplish my goal. I would be lying if I said that I've never cared about placing in races, but things are different now. I've accomplished all that I've wanted to accomplish, and I get much more glory out of helping someone reaching their goal time then placing first in my age group. Is this cheesy to say out loud? Sure. But, it's the truth and I've come a long way to finally get to this point. 

Which gets me to my next point. I struggled today because my body is tired. I've been pushing myself, and not following my training plan to a tee. I've been taking only one rest day instead of two, and switch my workouts up making them inconsistent. So today a quarter way through my workout, I decided this training run wasn't productive. See, when runs aren't productive, you should listen to your body and take the day off. It's better to come into a workout focused and physically ready. I did try today, but I couldn't pull it off.

Tomorrow I'm resting which is probably a good thing. I'm hoping on friday when I do my mile repeats I feel strong and rested. I've got to be ready for my five miler the next day. Oh, and as for the race I did Sunday. Well, after eating poorly and not making smart choices, I finished the four miles in 31:33, placing 3rd in my age group out of 128 girls. Now for the record, I felt like crap the whole race. So lesson learned: Having a hot dog and a half, four bites of a cheeseburger, a snocone, and a chocolate chip cookie two hours before the race is not a good idea. 

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